WTH!!
Is a happy ending really impossible whenever we do things together? How can we be so different.. amazing the amount of variation that can arise from just two little gametes..
Okay.. so we caculate.. let's say there are n no. genes.. fusion of gametes means you either choose AA or aa or Aa per gene. so the probability of us being different for each characteristic is 1/3. therefore probabiltiy of us being different is 1/3 ^ n.. is that alot? i mean how many different alelles (oh WTH i forgot how to spell.. alleles? should be correct lah.) are there?!

WHATEVER!!! Like it or not.. I'll be seeing you till the day I die so i'll just have to put up with it or put up with it. Like they always say.. change what you can, accept what you can't..

BUS DRIVERS ARE NICE PEOPLE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Woah.. I left my wallet on the bus just this morning and I received a call in the evening from the guard house that somebody picked up my wallet. It was the bus driver!! hahaa! Can't believe he drove all the way down to my house to return the wallet. Er.. in his pick-up truck, not his SBS bus.. dun be mad. Haha. Bus no. 43 SBS 863 C. Such a nice guy! Haha. Yay!!!! :)

I still think long is nicer.. dun you?? Haha.
Pardon all these random posts.. told you i'm feeling super bored. And you, have just wasted some time reading crap =)

So that concludes our journey on Singapore Idol..
I feel sad for Jonathan really.. He was so friendly to us.. I would have prefered him to have won actually, though Hady's got the voice. Man.. Yuting really loves Jonathan.. haha. Poor thing, only photo she got with him was a group photo and the guys were blocking the girls.. den all of them pissed off. Oops. SORRY!! lol. Oh well. Go Hady, better not let all your fans down.. and Jonathan, all the best dude!

Hey Hey!! I can be seen in the TV advertisement congradulating Hady!! lol.. the one behind Hady on the right.. it's me i think. :p hehe!!

Wohoo!!! Yesterday was sooooo fun! Haha.. the crowd at indoor stadium was really noisy!! Haha. Standing at the backstage, watching people screaming over the railings for their idols.. but we got the privelege of performing with them.. muahaha! ;p Some people say they saw me on TV, some say cannot see.. hmm. Nevermind, been on TV before liao! Hehe. Johnnie was so excited cos he had nine ppl messaging him after the concert to tell him they saw him. Haha.. i wonder why.. ;p I took photo with Jasmine tye!! Wahaha!! and Paul twohill.. the only two who came over to look for us. Paul came to deliver food to Daniel Thong.. Jasmine came simply because she's nice! haha.. She's from my senior class!! so cool!! Got her autograph.. wahaha. Hoping Jonathan and Hady visit us after their show today.. haven't got theirs yet. I only want these three autograph. Haha. Funny how i didn't even know i was talking to one of the top 10 that day outside the wardrobe and makeup room. :p Johnnie, Danny and I went out to buy drinks and the crowd was already starting to stream in.. so cool how we can just walk in and out with just a flash of our passes.. wahaha!! Saw Daphne Khoo too.. i had my camera in my pocket.. hmm.. nah, so thick skin. Haha. Paul twohill kissed Deborah! Haha! rrite.. well that was what she told me until this morning when she admitted it was through the glass window of the van. :p like dat also counted meh.. Hehe kk.




We had lotsa of free time to do our own stuff while waiting.. and i mean ALOT of free time. Tell us to get ready by wat time.. we can expect to sit there and stone till 2 hours past the stipulated time.. sheesh. Den we got bored and started singing stupid songs and i mean STUPID songs.. like O Macdonald..

As promised, here it is!!

Man i'm bored!!!!!
Can't seem to mug on weekends. They just seem to be the time to slack.. Hence my MPP for today is way low.. hiring me would incure more cost than revenue.. so a firm will choose not to hire me.. Haaa.. econs crap..

Oh well.. woke up at 8 plus, did 3 chem questions and read a bit of kaleidoscope den play psp, watch tv, play piano.. laze around. Waiting for 3.45pm to come. Ha!! Singapore Idol is fun man!!! lol. Although practices and rehearsals drag till so late and some mediacorp people can be soooo rude!!!

We were at indoor stadium rehearsing yesterday. Gurmit Sighn brought his kids along.. at first i was wondering why suddenly got little kids in the corridor.. den i suddenly saw him. Haha.. quite an exciting feeling see celebs in real life. Den Of Course, Jonathan and Hady were there.. Man they sing well!! I have a funny feeling jonathan will win.. but i think Hadys voice stronger.. Jonathan has the idol pattern lah.. he's friendly! haha. Hady's more of the cool type.

A few of us were watching the rehearsals in the main hall and guess where the rest were? In the corridor taking photo with the rest of the idol finalists!!! ARGH!! wasted lah.. never call me!!! ARGH!!!!! no fair !!!!!!!
hmpf.. i charged my cam liao!! today shall see if got chance to take. Hehe.
Oh yar! each of us were given this backstage pass which said "Singapore idol grand finals, ARTISTE" so cool!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm an artiste!!!! wahahah!!! Mum said cheap thrill.. hmpf.. jealous! =p

I finished a math paper!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wahahah!! oh yea.. =p den dad came home with sorbet from Haigen Daiz!!! wohoo!!!
And i was playing with the dry ice.. thinking about the chemistry behind it! Haha.. sorry mug too much liao =p Speaking about mugging.. and since Han Teng visited my blog.. i can't believe what he said!! lol

"You seem to much of a workaholic to be bothered about getting a girlfriend.." lol X 10^ X where x ---> infinity!! sheesh.

Hanteng, Hanteng.. me? a workaholic.. yea rite..



Eh.. heh heh.. i ate almost finished it before i decided to take a photo =p


Oh yea.. and here's to all the ppl suffering in VJ choir..
Wed: combined sectionals
Thurs: Rehearsal
Fri: rehearsal (till late)
Sat: rehearsal
Sun: Performance show
Mon: Results show performance

oh well.. we're all in this together.. how many days to GP paper? hmm 7.. practices are 5 days starting tmr.. by logical induction, promos come right after performance. GREAT!!! not..

It's funny how sometimes people complain so much that there are cliques all around and they feel left out but they don't do anything to integrate themselves into the "corporation" Haa! Haiz.. oh well. I guess some feel more at ease alone. Oh well..

Wah. I took 2 hours to study application syllabus for Bio.. argh!! Oh man.. and the dumb neighbour downstairs is some chain somker lah.. den the wind at my place so strong.. blow all the smoke into my living room.. stinko can!! den close the door.. so hot.. Argh!!

Anyway.. to all those taking major exams, i guess you're finishing liao right!! wohoo!! feel happy for you man!! Jia you!! :)

*%#&$^#@!!! why must we learn stupid math stuff like curve sketching when we spent $172 to buy a graphics caculator to do the job!! And why did we spend $172 to buy a dumb caculator which window is limited such that sometimes you dun see the whole graph!! Why in the $&^#^#*(@ we got to study irrelevant subjects man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Who the #&$^#% plots ln graphs?! Why can't we just make big $$ and pay some nut-head to plot for us.. grrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

stupid math!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am one bored frog..

Bored of commiting and breaking my word, repenting and sinning once more, re-dedicating and then straying all too soon after.

Dreams reveal my subconcious. They give me the clues to the desires and hopes that i cling on to. How do I stop myself from thinking about stuff? Cos everytime I wake up, I wake up from a reminder of how I yearn for the impossible. Other nights, i wake up from a cruel reminder of the reality that i live in, such dreams depict the status quo of my life. I wake up from one nightmare into another. From one 'reality' that i can wake up from, into a reality that i am mercilessly forced to accept.

So unnatural, so obvious, so damn dao..

Went for "His needs, her needs" workshop after church today. It's a course for understanding your spouse. Haha! I went there to "baby-sit" the children lah.. not as a participant in the workshop. But i had fun telling people that i was representing my dad to go with my mum since he was working and couldn't attend. Actually i didn't really baby-sit. Ben and Johann were doing that. I was studying with Dot, Carol and Mel. Oh but Janelle kept clinging to my finger! lol. Her hand so small.. cutting off the blood supply to my finger.. lol!

Managed to mug organic chem and a bit of trigo.. =p despite the talk on cute guys.. haiz wat else do girls talk about and get so excited over eh? Den went for a walk alone, pass the koi pond, bittersweet memories.. went to the playground where ben was doing cartwheels and handstands. Then went back to the clubhouse to play table-tennis. Mum left without us! lol.. actually we wanted to go home later lah, so she went home first. Followed Diane up to return the rackets, and at the same time let them know we leaving liao.. but aiya, i think bathing lah.. I said bye to Fluffy though! lol..

So.. tmr got free period cos i took chem spa last week. What should I study?? hmm...

Mum's birthday!!!!!!!!
Haha.. we went Angus Steak house. Den Dad got the ppl there to play birthday song as the waitress brought out the cake!! Awww.. Dad.. Haha!! Only short of a kiss. Lol.. well he tried.. but mum was too embarassed i think. I had a good laugh though =p

I miss the old days.. back then when i was just a kid. With not a care in the world. Out there having fun all the time. Only having to study a little when nearing the exams. Enjoying innocent friendships and going out together all the time.

I miss the times when we were still using abenezer chapel, running around behind the church building, catching spiders, picking red seeds. The older we get, the more compicated life gets. I miss the times when we stayed over at friend's houses and when we had youth canps. Particularly the one at Changi.

Everyone is too busy now. Everyone has too many things to do. What's wrong with the Education system in Singapore. Maybe i should migrate too.. yea like that's for me to decide. I feel so empty now, like there's nothing much to look forward to. Studying and Choir.. that's all. JC life is no life. Family tree carnival at VJ was nice. I went on some ride.. i came down with tears in my eyes. I had no idea why. Deborah asked me why i was crying. I shrugged. But now i know. I realised i hadn't been so happy for a long time. Just going up and down in circles on that ride, screaming together with everybody else at sudden drops and jus enjoying the ride. It was pure exhilaration for me on that ride. I was happy again.

I miss my old house at telok kurau. Walking along the cannel to the park. Or to Kembagan MRT, taking a train to orchard to catch a movie with friends. Something quite rare now. Even the holidays are packed.

I miss days in VS. Crapping whole day long.
I miss Japan! Beautiful scenery, disney land, universal studios. NO STUDY!! NO CARES!! Just have fun, eat, and shop and sleep.

Can't wait to go NS.. no need to bother about anything, just follow orders.



Time heals, how long till it's efficacious?

Sian Sian Sian Sian Sian!!! Haha likeong used for the teacher's day video presentation.. Yups. That's math. OK, maybe not all of math. Reccurence and Induction is SIAN!!!!!!!!! stupid lah, spent 2 hrs at tuition do nothing at all. Cos i give the teacher question to do but she see liao also sian. Den end up everybody chatting happily about dunno what thing also. Tried to do curve sketching and realise i dun have the dumb tutorial 9.2. Mr shi said today that the chem paper is gonna be difficult.. ARGH!!!!!! Scare all of us. Now i'm thinking if I'm not gonna do well due to a ridiculously difficult paper, den i study for wat!!

Why JC syllabus so difficult wan!! crap lah. Year 1 already like dat.. next year DIE!!



It's elise's birthday today!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I fallen in love with Final Fantasy man!! Haha! Eversince i realise ben bought FF7 Advent children and i could watch the whole thing in one shot and dun need to watch part by part in the choir room! lol. Isn't this blog skin so nice??? wohoo!! Haha.

Today i'm gonna take a break from studying and do other stuff. Actually i dunno what to do! Haha. PE today was so sianz.. play soccer. Bleh, not me. My class surprisingly got very few guys who like soccer too. So we got trashed by the s39.. oh well. Got whacked by my fried.. bit my own tongue.. so now i know how my tongue tastes..

Later that day i think my digestive system not working properly.. felt funny after lunch.. i think cos of the stuff i ate.. Noodles (alot of msg) + tomato juice + french fries! Haha choas in my stomach.. bleh. Felt like vomitting.. lol.

Fell asleep on the way home in the bus.. den everytime i wake up i see this kid staring at me.. Haha. Sheesh. Maybe cos he's sitting directly opposite me and got no where else to look. lol. but still, grr.. can't sleep in peace! lol.

Ai ya, nothing much happened today lah. Just blogging so that the new skin comes with a new post! lol. ciao.

Man! todae is one boring day..
Came home early after church telling myself i would study.. end up watching marathon tribute to steve irwin on animal planet and falling asleep on the couch. Cookie had an accident yesterday. Cos the newspaper at her toilet wasn't changed and so she had no where else to do it. End up she did it all over the floor. And i dunno why she got it stuck to her fur too. Woke up at 430am to her whining and saw her lying on the floor beside her crap. Yucks lah. Imagine sleeping next to s*#@. bleh!

Was just chatting with chun hao online just now.. i think our church lacks an emphasis on christian growth.. as in sunday school. Sunday school's always getting replaced by other stuff. I missed the times when we just sit down and learn about God. Past few lessons have been.. well interesting. But's that's as far as it gets. Unlike last time where it was about konwing how God is relevant in your life. Now i kinda dunno where is God's place in my life. I dunno how to apply what i learnt in sunday school cos I dunno where it's relevance lies. I wonder how the rest of the youths feel.. i can't speak for them but somehow, i sense alot of people drifting away. Yet i'm not saying anything, i'm not doing anything about it. What can i do? i need to be fed too, i dun think i'm in the position to feed others. I wonder how pastors and sunday school teachers can keep it up.. i wonder who keeps them in check. Pastor Swee Kee keeps saying she sees a pastor in me.. right now, i really dun think so.. hmm. Oh well. Just a bit of reflections for this boring lil day.

Going parkway for dinner now. Wouldn't it be weird if we meet again. Afterall, we've met there so many times without intending to.

A few random thoughts.. all sparked off by Ben's one sentence. "Ducks dun have lips"

1. How do ducks kiss? Their bill so flat..
2. How do dolphins kiss? Cannot even reach lah..
3. Hammer-head shark? o.O
4. Cows can't possibly hug can they? Their horns.. *clang* oww..

Haha! dun mind me.. i was watching Mickey Mouse on disney channel..Haha. Fairytale ending all the same lah. Mickey kissed Minney.. Donald kissed the other duck.. (hahahaha!!) Den goofy and the moose knocked their heads the first time they tried to hug! (rotfl)..

Wohoo.. just came back from dinner at sentosa! So fun! felt like i was on a holiday at a beach resort once more. Eating at an open air restaurant by the beach, talking crap with my family and listening to my parents tell their stories about their past dates and crushes. Apply for HDB = will u marry me.. wl. So unromantic lah.. haiz.. i hope to do better next time! Haha. Sheesh. The food was good!! Very good! Haha. my shirt had a taste of the chilli crab too! lol. I need a bib. I'm still superfull now! The short walk back to the car from the restaurant wasn't enough!! Although it was a nice walk. Palm trees, full moon. Soft lighting at the side of the walk way.. nice! Den in the car, well let's just say the air quality went from good to er.. bad.. so we decided to wind down the window for the rest of the drive.. Smell the cool night air, i love sentosa!! haaa.

It's amazing how a single smile can brighten up one's day.. Having said that i think singaporeans are moody people. Haha. Was on the bus today.. just a short trip to the post office to drop off a letter and there was this i think taiwanese girl on the bus who just kept on smiling. I was wondering what she could be so happy about.. But somehow just seeing another happy person can make u feel happy too. Haa. Weird, but really.. so. Moral of the story? SMILE!!! Haha. I shall try to smile often now.

Yeah.. i woke up at 745am todae! I'm so proud of myself =p Well it was an interesting morning.. sat at the balcony to eat breakfast and read my old diary entries. Read about the holidays i had.. Can't believe how much i've changed since then. And it was only 2 months ago. So many uncertainties that i wrote about have been brought to light, and yet again, so many hopes have been dashed. Oh well..

Den went to do some econs and bio.. argh the dumb TYS dat i bought only got MCQs.. den goondu me still go buy.. i think i need to wear specs liao.. nvm, at least i paid half of the price with a cash voucher.. that voucher sposed to go get a gift for someone.. but i dun think i'll get that gift anymore. There's lotsa things i wanted to do.. but i can't anynmore. Bleh.

No more teaching how to fold roses, no more ice skating, no more watching sunrise, no more high tea at equinox, no more hot air balloon ride.. oh well.. the things that we only said we were going to do. I should learn to live by the day.

Lunch was super fun! Haha! Ben had to cook for me! lol.. Instructions from mum. Ai yo! that boy.. first time cooking ar? What's with the big long
"oooooh" when i finally decided to show him how to light the stove! Haha! So amused when stirring the soup.. splatter all over the stove.. mashing the sardine until like porridge. Den there was this blob of soup (thick and creamy) dripping of the side of the pot that caught fire.. quite fun lei.. we just watched it burn! Haha! Den when i was eating the mashed sardine i picked up the sradine with my spoon bit by bit to examine which part of the fish i'm eating =p the spine looks like some tiny shellfish you see on the beach.. so cool! Haha cruchy! but i was trying frantically to search for eyeballs until ben finally decide to tell me that the sardines did not come together with their heads.. "OH!" haha.. preparing your own lunch is fun..

kk, gotta go continue mugging soon.. ciao

Yeah.. i woke up at 745am todae! I'm so proud of myself =p Well it was an interesting morning.. sat at the balcony to eat breakfast and read my old diary entries. Read about the holidays i had.. Can't believe how much i've changed since then. And it was only 2 months ago. So many uncertainties that i wrote about have been brought to light, and yet again, so many hopes have been dashed. Oh well..

Den went to do some econs and bio.. argh the dumb TYS dat i bought only got MCQs.. den goondu me still go buy.. i think i need to wear specs liao.. nvm, at least i paid half of the price with a cash voucher.. that voucher sposed to go get a gift for someone.. but i dun think i'll get that gift anymore. There's lotsa things i wanted to do.. but i can't anynmore. Bleh.

No more teaching how to fold roses, no more ice skating, no more watching sunrise, no more high tea at equinox, no more hot air balloon ride.. oh well.. the things that we only said we were going to do. I should learn to live by the day.

Lunch was super fun! Haha! Ben had to cook for me! lol.. Instructions from mum. Ai yo! that boy.. first time cooking ar? What's with the big long
"oooooh" when i finally decided to show him how to light the stove! Haha! So amused when stirring the soup.. splatter all over the stove.. mashing the sardine until like porridge. Den there was this blob of soup (thick and creamy) dripping of the side of the pot that caught fire.. quite fun lei.. we just watched it burn! Haha! Den when i was eating the mashed sardine i picked up the sradine with my spoon bit by bit to examine which part of the fish i'm eating =p the spine looks like some tiny shellfish you see on the beach.. so cool! Haha cruchy! but i was trying frantically to search for eyeballs until ben finally decide to tell me that the sardines did not come together with their heads.. "OH!" haha.. preparing your own lunch is fun..

kk, gotta go continue mugging soon.. ciao

Man.. it seems like i'm never going to finish studying... so much. And i can't understand stiochiometry! Sheesh! Tried to do reccurence tutorials today.. gave up after a while! ARGH. Choir is doing a musical at the end of the year. Well since there are so many people reading my blog now... you all must come k! WL.. since when so many ppl read my blog lah.. shucks. Grr.

Today played basketball then went to swim.. so very tired liao, so.. ciao!

Tail of a crocodile.

For days, the two lost contact with each other. Still, Crocodile continued to think about swan princess all the time. Then one day.. prison guard showed up for his shift with downcast eyes and a heavy heart. "The king has ordered your execution." He told crocodile. Crocodile knew this was coming, all he wanted to do now was to see his princess for the last time. The king considering the valuable service crocodile had given him and the honours he had brought to the kingdom, granted crocodile his last wish. Swan princess was brought before crocodile and the two were left alone to talk....

A week later, Swan princess watched as crocodile lay there, getting ready to come under the knife. Crocodile took one last look at the princess and closed his eyes. Death did not scare him, afterall, he had already died a week ago when the swan princess told him she no longer felt for him..

The end




I was a fool to think this would last forever, but still, I'm shocked all the same it's over so soon.

It's 8.30 in the morning, Fred is awake on his bed, unwilling to start the day. Unwilling to face the truth, that the dream, that the love he once knew, no longer existed. Mum comes into the room and sees that Fred is awake.

Mum: Fred, did anything break last night?
Fred (thinks to himself):Yes mum, my heart.
Fred: .... *silence*
Mum: Oi, wat happen to you, did you break anything last night?
Fred: No.
Fred (thinks to himself): Somebody else broke it for me
Mum: Sure ar? cos the balcony is full of glass!
Fred:!!!!!!!
Fred (thinks to himself): Well i was at the balcony last night when she told me, but no my heart isn't made of glass!

That was the exact conversation I had with my mum this morning. Wow, how ironic.

I don't understand, how can one have a change of heart so suddenly...

Between the 11 june to the 24 Aug. I experienced Newton's law of gravity to it's maximum ferocity. They say the truth hurts, i've never believed it till now. Waking up through the midst of tossing and turning in my bed trying to sleep, or checking and re-checking the calender to see what exactly happened on that day.. to find an answer to why you no longer felt for me.

It's amazing how in the morning I can be telling you how much I love you.. you smiled and blew a kiss to send me off wishing me a good day too. Yet on the very same day, you showed me the very other end of the world of emmotions. How your heart had turned cold all in less than 24hrs. 21 August, the day I waited for you to come online, after you said you would, only to find that when you finally did, you had nothing to say. I knew something was not right anymore.

It's amazing how powerful the word of one in authority can be. To take away a means of communication, and in so doing, breaking the thin thread our relationship hung onto. I tried to call, but you weren't home, i waited for you to call back, but you messaged and all you had was a "goodnight". Then, i knew something was really not right anymore.

It's amazing how i can try to contact you through a friend and you can actually tell her to ignore me. 24 august, I knew something was definitely not right.

And now i finally know the truth. I guessed it right. From where you didn't talk to me like before, when 'darling' became rountine, till it was no longer even used, till we didn't even talk anymore.

4 september, I knew you no longer loved me because you told me so..

Hmm no equinox tmr.. ok.. but den, i tot i'd go for the swenson's treat miss lyana giving the old sec 4A ppl. den suddenly postponed too.. bohoo.. alright. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.. er, Haha ! no link. Okay. But i really miss VS man. Miss the old class, miss the place, miss the teachers, miss VS choir (alot) miss the old subjects like A math and physics. Haha! those taking O levels now must think i'm mad or something. But that night went back for the Dinner at VS.. woah the feeling rox man! Doing VS cheer again after the Victorian Anthem. It's just different doing it with VS den with VJ. Food was quite good too though the service quite sub standard. Haha too many ppl liao 130 tables!!! And i guess they can't really be bothereed with students, got more important ppl to attend to like His Excellecny President SR Nathan. lol.. old victorian! cool! Haha. I wonder if i'll feel this way about VJ after i leave the college. Somehow i doubt it.

VJ's really fun. But it's just different. Maybe i had more freedom in VS that's why.. as in free time. And everybody's so much more relaxed, all guys wat! HEHE. At dinner it was so funny. Food come only everybody chiong ar! fastest time we finished a dish was 2 minutes i think. I took my share, look down to eat, look up and the plate is empty liao. Well.. it's a $25 well spent i think. I should have brought camera. Crap.. wanted to take photo with all my teachers.. Haha. So fun, running from table to table taking photo.. but all other people's camera. Gotta treck them down for the photos.

Busy busy busy.. everyone's busy. Time is scarce. Make full use of it. To do what's most important. And no, i don't mean study. OK, study first next time got more time for other things. Explain the concept of scarcity: Unlimited wants versus limited resources (econs defination) haha!! shucks i'm such a nerd. lol kk enough. I realise there are not many people like me around this planet. Willing to pour out all their emmotions into things. I've yet to meet someone like myself.. maybe I have. It's about treasuring the people you're close to, but that friend of mine not many friends also.. so maybe that's why. But.. ai ya, why am i blogging this. STOP!!!!! :p



Dear God, i've decided to follow you, I want you to come back into my heart and make it your home again. I don't ever wanna doubt you anymore. i can't believe I actually did.. i wonder if those whom i know to be strong in the faith do too. Into your hands, i commit again, with all i am, to you lord.